We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Christmas And I Am Not Afraid

from A Presbyter's Dementia by John Tabacco

/

about

Words and Music © 1997 by Gian DiMauro and John Tabacco
Published by It Iz What It Iz Music (SESAC) / Slip Code Technology Music (SESAC)

This tune sounds like a cross between Frank Sinatra's rendition of "In The Wee Small Hours Of The Morning", Brian Rivera's "Hey, Hey, Paula" and something by composer Vince Guaraldi. It started off as a song about someone who realizes he is being made brutally fun of behind his back by his so called best friends, relatives and trusted clergy. There isn't anything he can do about it except to leave his circle, start over again or commit suicide. It was one of those depressing tunes a lot of teenagers could relate too. Anyway, that premise soon fell to the wayside the day I casually played this idea on guitar while practicing some Gearhead Freaks music with Gian DiMauro. Gian liked the vibe of the piece and eventually we started formulating a new song in and around the chord progression. I quickly worked on a production for this piece but it was a bit too busy for the melody we had come up with. Gian came down to the studio one morning and really made the production happen. His concept was really focused, clear and inspiring. We finished it in a day. However, we still needed a lead vocalist. Neither one of us had the range or attitude to do the vocal justice so we called in our trusted musical friend Deborah Jones to take a whack at it. Considering she had only a day to practice it she did a typically wonderful job interpreting the lyrics and melody. The final result is a piece that captures (for me at least) the existential loneliness I feel during the winter holidays and the false hope of good things to come. By which I mean, if these good things do come, they are of course not permanent. All that is left on our death bed is our memories and faith that there is a reason for all the circumstances that have made up our seemingly small, instant lives. On the bright side, I must add that this is one of my favorite musical collaborations ever. A real tear jerker for me.
Melancholia to the max.

Note:
An early variation of this tune (the piece that was too busy) can be found as a backdrop to "Daniel's Sled". A horrifying Christmas tale by Anthony Pomes, about mankind's declining morality in an ever increasing world of violence and instant gratification.

lyrics

XMAS AND I AM NOT AFRAID

“Bout 30 years ago I was a happy child from a happy home
Now the grey has come, the lines are here I guess it’s part of being grown

There’s just no way of knowing
Where my life is going

(But it’s) Christmas and I am not afraid...
It’s Christmas and I am not afraid...

Each falling snow flake brings me back to all the Christmas’ gone past
I remember thniking that the joy and love they brought would always last

But the snow keeps blowing
There’s no way of knowing
Where my life is going
But the fire is glowing

(But it’s) Christmas and I am not afraid...
It’s Christmas and I am not afraid...

Pretty gifts with pretty bows are here for me but not to keep
Now the twilight of my life begins to beckon me to sleep

And the snow keeps blowing
There’s no way of knowing
Where my life is going
But the fire is glowing

(‘Cause it’s) Christmas and I am not afraid...
It’s Christmas and I am not afraid...

credits

from A Presbyter's Dementia, released September 28, 2014
Lead Vocal : Deborah Jones
GD : Programming, FX
JT : Electric guitar, Roland Guitar
Back ups : Marci Geller, Deborah Jones
Published by It Iz What It Iz Music (SESAC) / Slipcode Technology Music (SESAC)

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

John Tabacco Stony Brook, New York

John Tabacco is a composer, singer-songwriter, producer, recording engineer, and visual artist.

Like an unfolding musical diary / puzzle, Tabacco’s music and art are constantly being re-worked, juxtaposed and intertwined.

For more info : www.johntabacco.net
... more

contact / help

Contact John Tabacco

Streaming and
Download help

Report this track or account

If you like John Tabacco, you may also like: