We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Genetta's Email To Roger McGuinn

from Artificial Tales Of Gleep and Whimsy (Vol. 1) by John Tabacco

/

about

Story © 2023 by John Tabacco
Published by It Iz What It Iz Music (SESAC)

lyrics

GENETTA'S EMAIL To ROGER McGUINN

Dearest Roger McGuinn:

I know that you're not laughing but what you write is contagiously funny. Unhappiness is your middle name but it still fuels you and I still relish your emails. The sarcasm is masterful and sleek. Your “We're all just blank slates with external forces writing our scripts, pulling our strings as we play our pretended roles so perfectly”, describes the human condition so succinctly. I know you didn’t actually say that but I can imagine your voice saying it. Turn turn turn! It’s all pretend anyway. Who cares? I’ve pretended to be a musician my entire life and not a particularly good one at that, somehow I've just manage to squeeze by. Good "smoke and mirrors" technique I suppose. That's how I fly.

And speaking of flying, I'm not sure if I've ever heard a Blackbird sing for real. Have you? We're certainly not hearing one on the original recording. In fact, a lot of what we hear in suburbia are just greedy McDonald's Seagulls scoping out the parking lots for discarded burger buns and stale french fries. They are not as intelligent as the big black crows on a telephone wire who will conspire to swoop down on you in a raging choir if you stare at them long enough. They know if you are thinking about a delicious chicken and broccoli dinner (with sauce on the side). And I'm speaking from experience. It happened to me last week! Definitely a Hitchcockian moment. And god forbid you're trying to catch a few peaceful winks outside on the hammock when no sooner do you shut your eyes an alarm of annoying squeaks go off. It's some damn Bluejays dive bombing the occasional lone pussy cat that's sneaking about. And it doesn't stop there! I'm constantly dealing with a verbose mockingbird under the moonlight, outside my bedroom window that needs to show off it's impressive imitation of seventy five bird languages at 20 minutes a clip. Royal pain in the ass. And I'd be remiss if I did not mention the bird that wakes me up in the early morning like a jack-hammer on speed: The woodpecker. Pecker. Pecker! Pecker! These guys have no code of silence and their Morse code certainly makes the trunk of trees look like a bad skin disease. And since I'm in a foul contemplating mode, did you know I was once 20 feet away from an Eagle. And not the Don Henley type. No, this was an actual American Eagle. And let me tell you - when this bird flapped it's wings it was scary shit. It made a "woof" sound that was very intimidating. No wonder it's the symbol of our great US of A.
The revered inventor, jokester and diplomat Benjamin Franklin wanted the Turkey to be our national symbol but congress voted "NO". Apparently they are way too edible and ugly looking.

Speaking of Turkey, I remember back around 2010 my then bestie "Susan" woke up in a panic because she could not find her cell phone. While she was looking for it in tears and filthy language, I kept hearing this strange gobbling ruckus outside. As I peered through the tree house window I saw about 9 turkeys jumping up and around her car. What??? I opened the door to take a closer look. To my surprise there was Susan's phone vibrating on the roof of her vehicle. Each time it made a ring the turkeys would go crazy for it. It obviously communicated some special message to them. The trick was trying to rescue the phone amidst all these nasty gobble gobbles without being beaked to death. It took a while but we eventually found a few cans of stuffing and cranberries. As we approached them with these delicacies they thought the wiser and rapidly scattered away. True story.

Anyway, mid March is approaching as you reminded me and that can only mean birthday cake for many of my friends. They seem to be celebrated between mid March to mid April. "So let's party!" An unlikely phrase from yours truly. Birthday-Schmirthday. I could live without them as I am getting too old around these parts and I can't relate to all these "woke" folk who have no sense of irony or dark, absurd humor. BORING! Since everything I would naturally say offends someone - I shut my mouth nowadays and retreat into my mind where anything goes.
So what else is new.

Crosby says I certainly would not make a good politician. He's right. I'm relatively sane and reasonable. The current crop of political wankers and posers are mostly easy on the eyes sociopaths with huge egos who put spells on weak minded individuals to get them to pay for their nonsensical ideologies. They are all about control instead of helping society at large. But I guess that's always been the case. We humans have a long way to go before we are truly civilized (whatever that means) and fair to one another. Fortunately, I won't be around to see that happen. I figure I've got another 10 years to go and then it's off to another dimension. And rest assured I will be doing my best to not come back here again!

Oh, and how about you, oh wise Byrd-man of the West... Will you be returning?

credits

from Artificial Tales Of Gleep and Whimsy (Vol. 1), released November 1, 2023
JT : FX
Voice: Genetta Craig Lamoorehead
Recorded and Mixed at Suburban Hermit Studios III, Ronkonkoma, NY

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

John Tabacco image

John Tabacco Stony Brook, New York

John Tabacco is a composer, singer-songwriter, producer, recording engineer, and visual artist.

Like an unfolding musical diary / puzzle, Tabacco’s music and art are constantly being re-worked, juxtaposed and intertwined.

For more info : www.johntabacco.net ... more

contact / help

Contact John Tabacco

Streaming and
Download help

Report this track or account

If you like John Tabacco, you may also like:

Bandcamp Daily  your guide to the world of Bandcamp

On Bandcamp Radio

Featuring interviews with LA music scene pillar Kamasi Washington, and new London-based duo Mrcy.

listen now